Instilling Confidence and Value
Character is an attribute that has to be taught to kids, and they must learn it. Parents (primarily Dad) must understand building godly character in kids is a process. Teach application, not just implication. Teach the meaning of these words that instill, and demonstrate good character: Wisdom, gracious, patience, self-discipline, gentleness, trustworthiness, purity, others-centered, diligence, punctuality, generosity, honesty, perseverance, compassion, courageous, and hard working. Notice those words can also describe some character traits of God. Maybe that is why Paul said in Romans 8:29 we are to endeavor to become like Jesus! Along with those great words of good character go two other attributes that must be taught and learned: Confidence, and Value.
Confidence comes from having a firm faith or belief in what is right, proper, and effective. Make sure you teach that belief to them, and of course, that belief comes through Jesus and the Bible. Confidence comes from being told “well done”. Reinforce the confidence of your kids by making sure they are acknowledged or rewarded for a job well done, and are built back up after correction or discipline.
Confidence is also “knowing you will succeed because you have before.” When kids are scared or nervous, remind them of a similar even they have done, and succeeded at. Be sure to use the word “confident” or “confidence” when you help them, they will learn the meaning of the word, and a valuable life lesson.
Value is another trait you must teach. God loves your kids no matter what, so tell them that. There is nothing they can do that will diminish God’s love of them, and there is nothing they can do that will cause God to love them more. (He may be disappointed, or on the other hand be pleased, but His love never waivers). You should also have that same attitude toward your kids, and tell them. Dad, teaching your child they are valuable is a must. Showing them they are valuable is imperative. You have to spend time one-on-one for that to happen. You have to let them take a little risk, so they gain confidence, and you have the opportunity to express their value. Go ahead and let them make dinner, or mow the lawn, they may not do it like you want, but let them anyway, and let them (and others around) know they did a great job and it was valuable to you and your family.
Every child in a Christian home should know they are precious and have value, especially during the teen years when they are struggling to understand their value, and look for it in various places: so make sure your home is one place they feel secure and valuable. As mentioned above, value can be taught by having kids do tasks or chores at home so they feel part of the family, and part of making the home work. Make sure at least one chore is not mundane, but valuable. (Washing dishes is mundane, making the dinner is value inspiring) (buying the meat at the store is mundane, shooting an elk or catching fish for feeding the family is value inspiring)
Once a child knows they are precious and valuable, teaching them good character, and to make godly choices on their own is a lot easier.
Another great way to teach confidence and value is having your kids volunteer or do some community service. It sets aside self-contentedness that is so prevalent in our culture and focuses on helping others. Then, when the task is done, praise them and say “well done”, and reinforce the good feeling they get from doing something for others – and for the Lord, and tell them about the “crown” they will probably receive in Heaven for doing that task.
Confidence and value are different things, but they do go hand in hand. A child with little or no confidence doesn’t want to do anything and a child with little or no value has a dejected depressed demeanor. Neither of which do you want in your child.
“knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” Colossians 3:24
Tweet This
How do you make sure your kids are valued, instead of a nuisance?
You may also like:
